Thursday, May 8, 2014

When Given an Avocado, Make Gucamole

A Single Gringa in Mexico & Mexico a Sunny Place For Shadey Men.

One of my Vampire's in my life claimed that he owned the photographs I used on my covers of my two books so they were removed from Amazon while they investigated his absurd claim. He was proven wrong by the properties of the photographs. However,  I made a new cover and combined the two books as one. Something I wanted to do anyway. If you are given a lemon make lemonade.

The new title is, "When Given an Avocado Make Guacamole," with both books within, with the same titles. The book is finished and up as a Kindle & a paperback. You can order the Kindle version via this link to read on your Kindle, laptop or Iphone.

You can order for  your laptop or PC download this free
Every month I change out a chapter to read on this blog page.

Many thanks go to:

My best friends and, family in Mexico and, the United States who have shared these experiences with me, you are too many to list.

My proof reader; Freddy Lewis and his wife Linda in Houston who have been supportive and helpful with my writing.

My editor; Rebecca Frey..

My publisher; and a writer of 2 books, Demetrio Aldana.

My book cover designer, Laura Gordon.

About the Author:

Rebecca Harranad Fass is a U.S. Army Veteran. She’s traveled the world to over 70 countries, has worked in India with Mother Teresa, and is a former Board Member of the Jane Goodall Institute.

She is owner of Bekka Designs, you can see her designs on Facebook:

She is the writer of a blog, A Single Gringa in Mexico on blogger at:

She wrote and published “A Single Gringa in Mexico” which you can buy on Amazon as a ebook or a paperback:

What more is there to say about this writer? Except that she is an open book as you will see while reading her story.

Chapter 23 of Book 1

Chapter 23

Male Buddies in San Miguel de Allende.

I don’t want it to sound like there are not some great guys in San Miguel de Allende, but in a small town it is best not to date your buddies. If you break up, they are everywhere, and it is so public. I remember when Berkley and I planned a speed dating event at Sunset. Here we are in a town twenty woman to every one man. Only men showed up, and she and I were shocked.  We had not planned to be part of the event other than working to make it happen. But it was obvious we were going to have to speed date ourselves.
It was really interesting as we heard their point of view about being single men in San Miguel de Allende. One suggested that we just read each a question and go in a circle and answer it. It was very much like our sisterhood fellowship, except she and I were in a large group of men alone. It was really a lot of fun that night, and they all said that for them the only great girls in town were their buddies and agreed that in a small town you should not date your friends. We found out that night they were very much like us girls.
When I first let my Vampire fly away, there was a man who had moved to town, and we became secret friends. I had never had a secret friend before. Only Cali and Berkley knew about it.  I would go to his house, and he would cook dinner for me and we would sit outside in his garden and drink wine and watch the sunset and then watch a movie together. He was going through divorce and I was healing, and we had great conversations and friendship. Listening and helping each other through our crises. To this day I still ask his opinion whenever I need advice from a man’s point of view.
At that same time there was a man who would see me online and send me a chat asking me to come over as his Jacuzzi was on with candles and he had wine and was great at giving a massage and he knew I could use one. I always declined as he was one of the three men Cali was dating at the same time. That would have been against our girls’ rule. So I avoided his offers and just became his friend as well.
My first date in San Miguel de Allende was set up by my Houston/New Orleans friend. It was so funny as suddenly, as we were talking, it dawned on me that he was on the same dating service I was on,, but he looked so very different. I asked him and he said yes that was him. We had a great laugh about it and that was our last date. We are still great friends and were King and Queen of Carnival at Harry’s one year together.
When he and I were King and Queen of Carnival, we had great fun, but we also took it as a responsibility. We were both there by noon each day and did not leave until the last drunk fell down. I was asked out by many men that week. I said no, that this was a job. There was this one tall, good looking man from Denmark. I kept saying, when Carnival is over! I made a date with him the following night after Carnival was over. I have never in my life stood someone up. But I decided to take a nap before the date and did not wake up until the next morning. Of course, he had left town that day.
 Here is an example of the power of an internet dating site:  One day I was sitting at the El Jardin cafĂ© alone, and a man came up to me and said, “Excuse me aren’t you on” I said I was, and he said he was from Mexico City and had been looking at my profile and had no idea I would be so easy to find in San Miguel de Allende. He asked if he could join me, but I declined and told him I was waiting for my girlfriends. Similar experiences happened to me three other times with online dating and living in San Miguel de Allende. was the first Internet dating site I was on. It was worldwide and free. You could search by zip code for men if you were traveling or wanted to meet someone in your area. But they had this interesting game where they would send you choices and you would hit yes or no if you wanted to meet them. I hit no so often that they sent me a email saying no one had ever said no as many times as me. But one night I was talking on the phone to my best friend in Ajijic and playing the game on as we spoke, and so was she. We both got a message during this from the same man wanting to meet us both. I told her, wow a really good looking man just contacted me. She said, me too. She cut and pasted his photo to me in an email and it was the same man. Needless to say neither of us ever met him. It was "delete".
Because I am a manly woman, it is easy for me to have male friends. They feel very comfortable around me and seem to even forget that I am a woman. There were many times I would be at Harry’s or Berlin and sit with a group of male friends and be one of the boys. It was a very different experience than being out with my girlfriends.
One evening I was with the boys and a tourist came up and introduced himself and asked who I was, out with so many boys? I told him I was actually a transvestite and I had him convinced and my buddies were holding back laughter.
One night at Harry's there was a group of us girls sitting near the door and two great-looking men walked in whom we had never seen before and walked right past us and sat on the other side of the bar. I went over to them both and asked how they could walk into a bar past the most beautiful women in town and just ignore us and would they care to join us? They both did and they came back to my house to sit on my roof and share wine and talk. The one was leaving the next morning to go back to Denmark and the other lived in Leon and was going through divorce and became one of our girl’s best male buddies ever. He even moved to San Miguel de Allende after meeting us.
One evening when I was sitting alone at Longhorn waiting for my girlfriends, some married men asked me to come and sit with them and then they decided to tell me exactly why I was single and why their wives were married to them. That was very enlightening to say the least. They said that I had a barrier up that would not allow men to approach me and that they had single male friends who would like to go out with me, but were afraid to approach me. I thought that was fair and told them that I don’t date local boys and why. They said their wives settled and I needed to as well, or I would be single forever. That not only hurt but also made me feel sorry for their wives to have settled. I thought they were all happily in love and wondered how could that be if you settled? I don’t think you can make yourself fall in love; you have to have the chemistry in the first place and that doesn’t come with settling.
Some of my best male buddies were waiters or bartenders at Harry’s. All the restaurant and bar personal in San Miguel de Allende go to La Cucaracha when the place they work at closes. It is our late-night swinging door bar, also the oldest bar in San Miguel de Allende. It only serves tequila and beer and has the best juke box music in town. It was always great fun to dance with these guys until the wee hours of the morning. They always made me feel good about myself, telling me that they not only loved me because I tipped so well and brought them so many customers, but that I could drink like a man and not be a falling down drunk. And no matter how much of a flirt I was, I always went home alone, so they had respect for me. Let this be a lesson to all, that the waiters and bartenders know us all very well.
This is a perfect example of why you don't date local boys, nor do you believe them if you do. I met a man at Mama Mias one night when I was out with my girlfriends. He said he lived in town, but I had never seen him before. He asked me out and was very clear that he was separated from his girlfriend. We met at the Longhorn for dinner and were having a wonderful dinner and conversation. Suddenly, I see this Mexican woman coming towards us with a purpose. She says to him, "Mi amore why are you not home?” I put my hand out to her and introduced myself and said I was so glad to finally meet her (I had guessed who she was) and asked if she would care to join us as he was just keeping me company while I was waiting for my girlfriends. She declined and left. He thanked me for being so quick on my feet, and I told him to never call me again.
I have gone on some male road trips as well as chick trips. The first one was to San Antonio with two men who were best friends. I had to go up to the VA in San Antonio and knew they were veterans and did not have a car. I don’t drive at night; men do. So we left at midnight and got there at noon. Twelve hours in a car, way too long! My mantra is: “Are we there yet?” I sat in the back like a little girl as they took over the car and the road trip-taking turns driving and arguing the entire time. They fussed about where to buy coffee, which border to cross, which was the best place to buy gas in Mexico and whether they should fill up before crossing the border, and whether they should take the toll road or the free road. They were both wonderful with me and would not let me go to the ladies room without one of them guarding the door. Then I would come out, and one would tattle tale on the other about having a beer and not being able to drive. It would have been great to sleep in the back seat with no responsibility, but with the fighting it was impossible. At one point when the driver missed a turn and there was a serious battle over it, I spoke up for the first time. “Guys tell me the truth; are you two really married to each other?” One thought it was funny and the other did not. I felt like a little girl in the back seat of my parent’s car, listening to those two. Needless to say today they are still not friends.

Harry's Carnival Video: